It's My Life
by Morgana Ravenheart
Summary: My name is Jess Callaway. I'm thirteen, I'm a boarding school student and I'm a Muggleborn witch. Welcome to my crazy world of being a Muggleborn in a room full of wizards who don't get the references you're making. DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING BUT JESS. ALL RECOGNIZABLE THINGS BELONG TO JKR AND THE HEADCANNONS TO THE PEOPLE ON TUMBLR WHO POSTED THEM. THANK YOU.
1. Prologue

**It's My Life**  
**By Morgana Ravenheart**

**A/N: Yes. Yes, I know I should be writing LPG and TMV and FTS. I know. But this is in my head and I have to get it down. **  
**So I've seen a load of Muggleborns-at-Hogwarts posts and it kinda inspired me. I'm using one of my OCs, Jess Callway (*cough*SansaStark*cough*). She's awesome, funny, pretty, sarcastic and cynical. This is her life as she knows it at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. **

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My name is Jessica Elizabeth Anne Callaway. I'm thirteen, I've got blonde hair and blue eyes, pale skin and I go to boarding school. Only, it's not a normal boarding school.  
I'm a witch.  
No, not everyone in my family is a magical being. We were all really fuckin' surprised when some woman called Tracey Davis showed up on are doorstep three days after I blew up Mum's favourite vase because I was trying to get my kitten out of it.  
But yeah, I've been at Hogwarts for three years now. And let me tell you, it's not been easy.  
First you've got the stairs. I mean, who the hell needs so many fucking stairs in a castle? It's exhausting.  
Then there's the sports. Quidditch? What the fuck is that about? Only twenty-eight people out of the entire fucking school plays the sport but everyone else in the school is always so hyped about it? What. The. Fuck.  
Of course, there's the lessons. The only one that's even close to an actual Muggle lesson is Arithmancy. That deals with numbers. Yet I still don't get it. I think the only lesson I actually like is Charms. That's pretty relaxed and okay. It reminds me of Mrs Chadwick from next door.  
Anyway, then there's the Houses. According to the younger siblings of previous students, there used to be a lot of competition between the Houses. Gryffindor and Slytherin were deadly enemies, Ravencloaw and Slytherin were intellectual enemies, Gryffindor and Ravenclaw were enemies in the brains or brawn sense. Only the Hufflepuffs got on with everyone. Seriously, if you hurt a Hufflepuff with friends in all Houses you might find yourself on the receiving end of a cunning, well-coordinated daring attack.  
So yeah. I was Sorted (by a hat. What the fuck is up with that?) into Gryffindor. So I got some new red-and-gold stuff and a bunk in the dorms. The girls are all pretty okay. Like Maddie Chang. She's the flying instructor's daughter. There's this big scandal about who her father is because she's got green eyes. What's so bad about having green eyes?

But thing that makes this whole place bearable?  
The muggleborns.

No, seriously. Jazz Hall in Ravenclaw figured out the anti-electronic wards and she revamped them. Now we all have TVs and DVD players in the common rooms. The first and second years have sleepovers in the common rooms watching Disney movies while we keep an eye on them. Not too much, we like them to think they're independent and grown-up. I think my heart broke when the wizarding children watched the Lion King and Mufasa died. To be honest, I cry at that all the time. And I was with the best of them belting out Make A Man Out Of You when they watched Mulan.

Hallie Jorgaundson in Slytherin deals like pads of paper and fountain pens for five galleons for a set of three pens and six ink cartridges with two pads of paper. The professors have no idea that when they get an essay it's been written with a fountain pen. Half the muggleborns owe her shitloads of money for lost pens and spare pads of paper.

And Frank Longbottom in Hufflepuff can get virtually any Muggle food you could want. Craving a Crunchie bar? KitKat Chunky? You want a can of full-fat Coke or some crisps? Frank's your guy. He can get you anything. And I mean, anything. I once asked him to get me a tube of Smarties, the huge ones that they only sell at Christmas, and like half an hour later he gave me a tube of Smarties. It was awesome.

So, yeah. These are my crazy adventures. I hope you enjoy 'em cause it took a whole lot to write them down. Especially remembering them all cause they were a 'had to be there' kind of thing.

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**A/N: Hope you enjoyed! Special thanks to tumblr users whatthebuckbarnes, edwardianfred and gogoravenclaw for posting the ones that inspired this! Please review, favourite and put on alert if you liked what you read.**

**Peace out homies, **

**-'Gana xx**


	2. Chapter 1: Bohemian Rhapsody

**Chapter One: Bohemian Rhapsody**

**A/N: What's this? An update? So soon after it's been posted? Well I just can't stop my typing fingers!**

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I was sat at the table in the middle of dinner, pushing my food about. No one really noticed I wasn't eating. What can I say, I was feeling low? It was Mum's birthday and I wasn't able to be there for her party. And Mum's birthday parties were the best.

_"...put a gun against his head..." _

My head shot up. I saw someone along the table singing under their breath. I grinned. This was Mum's favourite song. It was no one's favourite song, but if you put it on I could guarantee everyone would sing along. It was one of those songs, you know? Anyway, I let the person finish the verse before singing the next one.

_"Mama, ooh. Didn't mean to make you cry but if I'm not back again this time tomorrow, carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters." _

The guy looked over at me, and he smiled slowly. Then there was someone singing behind me.

_"Too late. My time has come. Sent shivers down my spine, body's achin' all the time. Goodbye everybody. I've got to go, gotta leave you all behind and face the truth." _

A voice over the top of the others starting singing from the Slytherin table. _"Mama, ooooohhhh. I don't wanna die, sometimes I wish I'd never been born at all." _

I started singing again. _"I see a sillhouetto of a man-"_

_"Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the Fandango?-"_

_"Thunderbolts and lightening,-"_

_"very frightening me!"_

_"Galileo-"_

_"Galileo-"_

_"Galileo-"_

_"Galileo figaro-"_

_"Magnifico-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-"_

_"I'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me-"_

_"He's just a poor boy from a poor family-"_

_"Spare him his life from this monstrosity!"_

And then the entire Muggleborn population of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry started to sing the epic hit that was Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody.

_"Easy come, easy go, will you let me go?-"_

_"Bismillah! No we will not let you go!" _

_"Let him go!"_

_"Bismillah! We will not let you go!" _

_"Let him go!"_

_"Bismillah! We will not let you go!" _

_"Let me go!"_

_"Will not let you go!" _

_"Let me go!"_

_"Never, never let you go!"_

_"Never let me go, oh!"_

_"No!"_

_"No!"_

_"No!"_

_"No!"_

_"No!"_

_"No!"_

_"No!"_

_"Oh mamma mia, mamma mia!"_

_"Mamma mia let me go!"_

_"Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me-"_

_"For me-!"_

_"For me-e-e-e-e-e-!"_

Here, we all started to headbang. Most were doing air guitar, and jumping up and down. Then we were singing again.

_"So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye-e?-"_

_"So you think you can love me and leave me to die-e?-"_

_"Oh, baby-"_

_"Can't do this to me baby-"_

_"Just gotta get out,-"_

_"Just gotta get right out of here!" _

_"Oh yeah-!"_

_"Oh yeah-!"_

We calmed down, and sat back down, still singing.

_"Nothing really matters. Anyone can see,-"_

_"Nothing really matters-"_

_"Nothing really matters, to me."_

And finally, the person who started it all sang the last line.

_"Any way the wind blows." _

The Great Hall exploded into clapping and cheering. After McGonagall settled them down, she thanked us all for a wonderful performance but begged us to join the choir instead of spontaneously bursting into song in the middle of dinner.

I went to be a happy student, and I sung a few bars softly to myself in honour of my mother.

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**A/N: Well. That's awesome. I spent like half an hour typing the lyrics up because my word doesn't let me C+P from the internet. So yeah. How'd I do? **


	3. Chapter 2: We Will Rock You

**Chapter Two: We Will Rock You**

**A/N: Oh, baby, I'm really getting into this! Another update for you all! **

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I can't believe that my best friend, Nicola Garrett, dragged me to this. She knows I hate Quidditch! It's loud and noisy and you can't see shit. You don't even get snacks! It's total bullshit, man. I grumbled once again as I huddled into my coat. "Don't even get music."

Then someone behind me started clapping. And I got an idea.

I stamped each of my feet and clapped once. _Stamp, stamp, clap. Stamp, stamp, clap. _

_Stamp, stamp, clap. Stamp, stamp, clap._

_Stamp, stamp, clap. Stamp, stamp, clap. _

_Stamp, stamp, clap. Stamp, stamp, clap. _

Others recognized the song. They grinned to their friends and joined in. Then I started to sing.

_"Buddy you're boy makin' big noise, gonna be a big man some day. You got mud on yo' face, you big disgrace, kickin' your can all over the place. Singin'-"_

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap._

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap._

Someone took over from me as I was about to sing the next verse.

_"Buddy you're a young man hard man, shoutin' in the street gonna take the on the world some day. You got blood on yo' face, you big disgrace, wavin' your banner all over the place. Singin'-"_

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap._

"SING IT!" I screamed.

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap._

Someone else started to sing.

_"Buddy you're an old man poor man, pleadin' with your eyes gonna make you some peace some day. You got mud on your face, big disgrace, somebody better put you back into your place." _

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap._

"SING IT!" someone yelled.

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap. _

"EVERYBODY!"

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap._

_"WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!" Stamp, stamp, clap._

I sat down. "Alright."

Okay, so it wasn't so bad. It was kinda fun. Then the Slytherins started singing "Who Let The Dogs Out?" and that was less fun.

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**A/N: Okay, so sue me for not putting the Who Let The Dogs Out bit in. I couldn't be bothered. So sue me.**


	4. Chapter 3: Another One Bites The Dust

**Chapter Three: Another One Bites The Dust**

**A/N: Shh. No one knows about us.**

* * *

After the match, which Gryffindor naturally won, we all piled out. Most were still singing. The team were ahead of me and my friends. I was in the middle, Nicola on one side and Hannah on the other.

Nicola giggled and she leaned over to whisper to me and Hannah, gesturing to one of the beaters, Steve McCall. _"Steve walks warily down the street, brim pulled way down low."_

Hannah grinned as well and she joined in. _"Ain't no sound but the sound of his feet, machine guns ready to go."_

_"Are you ready, are you ready for this are you hanging on the edge of your seat?"_

_"Outside of the doorway bullets rip to the sound of the beat."_

Both looked at me expectantly. I sighed, rolled my eyes and clapped three times. _"Another one bites the dust. Another one bites the dust. Hey! I'm gonna get to you too, another one bites the dust."_

Nicola smiled and sung the next verse, grinning. _"How do you think I'm gonna get along without you, when you're gone? You took me for everything that I had and kicked me outta my own!"_

_"Are ya happy, are ya satisfied, how long can you stand the heat? Outside of the doorway bullets rip to the sound of the beat," _Hannah took over.

We all sang the chorus. _"Another one bites the dust. Another one bites the dust. And another one gone and another one gone, another one bites the dust."_

_"Another one bites the dust."_

_"Another one bites the dust."_

_Another one bites the dust."_

_"Another one bites the dust."_

_"There are plenty of ways you can hurt a man, and bring him to the ground. You can beat him, you can cheat him, you can treat him bad and leave him when he's down."_

_"But I'm ready, yes I'm ready for you I'm standing on my own two feet."_

_"Outside of the doorway bullets rip, repeating to the sound of the beat."_

_"Another one bites the dust."_

_"Another one bites the dust."_

_"Another one bites the dust."_

_"Another one bites the dust."_

We grinned, laughing as we made it back into the castle. We were still humming the song as we went to bed that evening.

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**A/N: That literally took me four tries to write it all because my laptop kept crashing.**


	5. Chapter 4: Ain't No Mountain High

**Chapter Four: Ain't No Mountain**

**A/N: Yes. I know. I'm sorry. Please don't kill me. Or throw tomatoes. I hate those. Anyway, here's a little fun; inspired by the Guardians of the Galaxy soundtrack. **

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A few weeks later, me and the girls were having a dorm. Someone had brought their iPod, grinning, scrolling through songs.

Then some familiar piano notes started to play.

_"Listen, baby..." _

"Oh my Godric," I rolled my eyes, giggling. "You didn't."

"Oh, I did," the girl laughs.

I started to sing with a sigh. But really, I loved this song. _"Ain't no mountain high,"_

_"Ain't no valley low,"_

_"Ain't river wide enough baby,"_

_"If you need me call me,"_

_"No matter where you are,"_

_"I'll be there in a hurry,"_

_"You don't have to worry!"_

_"Cause baby, there ain't mountain high enough,"_

_"Ain't no valley low enough,"_

_"Ain't no river wide enough,"_

_"To keep me from gettin' to you baby!"_

_"Remember the day I set you free?"_

_"I told you, you could always count on me."_

_"From that day on, I made a vow,"_

_"I'll be there when you want me,"_

_"Some way, some how..."_

_"Cause baby, there aren't no mountain high enough,"_

_"Ain't no valley low enough,"_

_"Ain't no river wide enough,"_

_"To keep me from gettin' to you!" _

_"No wind, no rain!"_

Now one of the girls, name of Georgina Marks, a mixed race girl with a belting voice, started to sing.

_"My love is alive, way down in my heart; although we are miles apart. If you need a helping hand, I'll be there on the double, as fast as I can!" _

_"Don't you know that there ain't no mountain high enough,"_

_"Ain't no valley low enough,"_

_"Ain't no river wide enough,"_

_"To keep my from getting to you!"_

_"Don't you know that there ain't no mountain high enough,"_

_"Ain't no valley low enough,"_

_"Ain't no river wide enough,"_

_"To keep me from getting to you!"_

So, yeah. We karaoked to Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, ending up jumping on the beds, having a pillow fight and singing like pur lungs would burst.

And I loved _every_ single minute of it. Sometimes, just sometimes, I love my school.

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**A/N: Okay. Yeah. I guess you can yell at me now?**


	6. Chapter 5: I Know (500 Miles)

**Chapter 5: I Know (500 Miles).**

**A/N: Okay. Okay. Yeah I'm sorry. But I had no laptop. But I gots a new one now and now I get to give it all to you. I own nothing that you recognize. **

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The night after the sleepover, me and my friends were walking around the Lake. We may or may not have been following our friend Jazz and her new boyfriend Damien on their first date, but that _is_ so not the point.

_"When I wake up, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who wakes up next to you. When I go out, yeah I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who goes along with you. If I get drunk, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who gets drunk next to you. And if I haver, yeah I know I'm gonna be, I know I'm gonna be the one who's havering to you." _

"Is he...?" I asked Lina.

"He is," Lina replied.

"Oh my Merlin," Natalie breathed.

"Sweet baby Jesus," Katya murmured. "Damn I'd give anything for James to do this."

_"But I would walk five hundred miles, and I would walk five hundred more, just to be the one who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your door."_

_"When I'm workin', yes I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who workin' hard for you. And when the money comes in for work that I do I'll pass on almost every penny on to you. When I come home, oh I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who comes back home to you. And if I grow old, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who's growin' old with you."_

"Is she?" Jacqueline asked.

"She is," Hannah replied.

"Hot damn," Maggie whispered.

"What'd I do for Charlie to do this..." Ruby murmured.

"That's my twin brother, Rubs," Natalie sighed.

_"But I would walk five hundred miles and I would walk five hundred more, just to be the one who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your door."_

"Oh, it's our line!" I whispered quickly. "Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-da-da dun-diddle un-diddle un-diddle uh da-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-da-da dun-diddle un-diddle un-diddle uh da-da!"

_"When I'm lonely, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who's lonely without you. And when I'm dreamin', well I know I'm gonna dream, I'm gonna dream about the time when I'm with you."_

_"When I go out, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the one who goes along with you. And when I come home, yes I know I'm gonna be, I'm comes back home with you."_

_"I'm gonna be the one who's coming home with you." _

_"But I would walk five hundred miles and I would five hundred more, just to be the one who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your door." _

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-da-da dun-diddle un-diddle un-diddle uh da-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-da-da dun-diddle un-diddle un-diddle uh da-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-da-da dun-diddle un-diddle un-diddle uh da-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-lat-da!"

"Da-da-da dun-diddle un-diddle un-diddle uh da-da!"

_"And I would walk five hundred miles,"_

_"And I would walk five hundred more,"_

_"Just to be the one who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your door."_

"I can't believe he did it."

"On their first date."

"Her favourite song."

"Serenaded her."

"And she sung back."

"It was beautiful."

"Jazz is gonna go mad later."

And then, as one, we all yelled out to her, "MARRY HIM."

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**A/N: So that was fun. I was singing it all in my head. But the Sunshine on Leith version. **

**There was fireworks outside. IT'S NOT EVEN HALLOWEEN YET LET ALONE BONFIRE NIGHT. WAHT.**


End file.
